The Lithuanian Engraved Butter Knife Has Arrived

This has got to be my best-article title.

It goes to the heart of what this blog is all about —– unique one-of-a-kind word associations. Lithuania has gotten a lot of press lately, but I’ve seen nothing about engraved butter knives.

The events I’m about to relate must be told.  

This is a true story. It will probably be funny only to my immediate family members. To find the humor in this —- for best results —- I recommend that the reader first consume at least 3 glasses of wine. Go ahead. Take care of that. I recommend a rich Malbec. I’ll leave a gap here to allow the wine to take effect.

O.K. Ready?

The dog’s name was Sasha, a golden retriever. She was the typical family dog. She understood English. Not really, but she knew happy talk vs. anger. Whenever I attempted home repair of any kind, profanity was part of the process. Dog’s are smart. 

Sasha made the repair /irrational/anger/profanity connection early in our relationship.

I’m not a “tool guy”. Back then, real tools were scattered throughout the household in what are known as “junk drawers”. Most families have them. They’re used for items which have no permanent home and are seldom used ——kinda like common sense. 

So, rather than search for a real screwdriver, I skipped the search phase and grabbed a butter knife.

Pavlov would have loved this part. Over time, Sasha learned to slink away whenever I had the butter knife in my hand outside of the kitchen. She knew what was coming. 

25 years later, my granddaughter chose to memorialize this story by ordering a butter knife engraved with “If Papa can’t fix it …….” From, of all places, Lithuania for my birthday back in June.

We tracked it for 2 months. It finally arrived on August 1st.

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