Smashed Mammals

A few days ago, smashedmammals.com was one of my candidates for a new domain/website. Fortunately, it’s been ruled out as too offensive to most of you. As you read the following, imagine it being delivered on stage by George Carlin or maybe Jay Leno. I suggest you look at either one on YouTube for just a minute to get in the right frame of mind. It’s my brand of humor – a little too acerbic? Yes. I promise to be profoundly serious in my next article. So, why am I writing about roadkill? 

There are several reasons: 

First, the title is so alliterative. I love alliteration, albeit, in this case, we’re talking about roadkill. Put that aside and just enjoy the sound of it.

Another reason for penning smashed mammals is to share with you how these titles find a place in my brain. This one came about as I was driving to the health club last Saturday morning for my daily swim. Just like any other day, there were several smashed mammals, or, crushed cadavers, if you prefer more alliteration, lying on the highway. 

How do you feel, generally speaking, about roadkill? Do you take one quick look and think “EWE “? Is your level of disgust influenced by the genus of the victim? Is an Opossum more tolerable and more easily dismissed than someone’s family pet? Maybe if we took the time to better understand and appreciate the Opossum, we would view their demise with more compassion. They ain’t pretty, but, click on this link and get to know some of the 70 American species a little better.

  https://www.google.com/search?q=opossum+genus%3F&oq=opossum+genus%3F&aqs=chrome.69i57j0j0i22i30l4j0i390l4.18682j0j15&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

“Males are most active between 11 pm and 3 am”, according to Wikipedia. That’s a big part of their problem. I’m guessing. When I was a lot younger, I often found trouble when I was out “socializing” in that time frame. Perhaps one of the animal rights groups could implement a campaign to Save the Possum by designing a luminescent collar for the little critters. 

Wikipedia has many more interesting opossum facts but I’ll let you dig into them yourself. Most of them are borderline disgusting, especially the part about them being edible.

Rabbit with leatherwood honey, saffron and celery????

Just replace the rabbit with possum. You can literally pick up a few of them for free.

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